Horror Remix

Horror Remix Presents… SPORTS
2 Hours of ‘Offensive’ Horror
Rated R

Wednesday, July 14th 10PM
Free Admission!!!

STUDIO MOVIE GRILL
Atlanta (Holcomb Bridge)
Dallas (Royal)
Kansas City (9:30 PM!!!)

ALAMO DRAFTHOUSE
Austin (Lake Creek)
Houston (West Oaks)
San Antonio (Westlakes)
Winchester, VA

Horror Remix Presents… SPORTS from Edward John on Vimeo.

July 14th is the only day of 2010 with no professional sporting events. It’s the day after the MLB All-Star game and the baseball players are still off. All the other major sports are off season. So, what’s a sports fan to do? Hang out with their family? Hell no. Horror Remix gots yo back with 2 hours of the most dangerous game: appalling sports-horror movies.

Fatal Games (1984)
“Winning isn’t everything, winning is the only thing.” – Fatal Games theme

The theme song may feature a tired cliché by today’s standard, but in 1984 that may have been the inspirational push to “take it to the limit…” Horror Remix likes a kick ass, fist-pumping, motivational rock song to start a horror film. Graduation Day pulled it off with “Everybody Wants To Be A Winner” and now Fatal Games bookends their movie with “Take It All The Way” (soundtrack available on Saban Records and Tapes).

Fatal Games gives that something extra to push horror fans over the top. There is a ton of nudity, a couple of memorable kills and a finale that does, in fact, “take it all the way.” There is no plot. At all. And the character development isn’t a priority. So much so, that when athletes get waxed, I don’t remember exactly who they were. That’s fine. My only concern with Fatal Games is the lack of cussing. This is fucking unacceptable.

The Majorettes (1986)
S. William Hinzman only directed 2 films, The Majorettes and the zombie classic* FleshEater (1988). And although the 2 films are completely different, you can tell that they are made by the same director.

I can’t possible describe what makes his films unique. Maybe it’s the pace or the acting. But I think it’s a technical thing; the film stock’s grain. The tone of the audio. Not sure. It just feels comfortable. Like the smell of detergent in a blanket. It’s subtle, but there.

The Majorettes is a slasher. The Majorettes is a biker film. The Majorettes is an action film. Frankly, it’s a mess. This is cool with me, however, this is probably why it could never find a fan base. No one knew what it was. However, the important elements are here: weirdness, cheese and memorable moments.
*not really a classic

Killer Workout (1986)
Once you read the title, you already know what you’re in for. Pun horror titles usually deliver the 80s cheese (Chopping Mall, Hide and Go Shriek, Iced). If you like that sort of thing, this is the pinnacle of unintentional comedy.

This is the movie that started Horror Remix. Desperately wanting the world to see this film, yet knowing no reasonable person would sit through it. Killer Workout is a very boring movie with some of the greatest moments in film history. It’s a give-take. Killer Workout gives you 10 minutes of gold for 85 minutes of your life (remix is only 35 minutes).

The soundtrack is amazing. Probably the greatest soundtrack ever made… and there is no way I’m overselling that. Uplifting-disco-synth-r&b-pop. I’m thinking Pointer Sisters without a record deal. Saturday Night Fever can’t touch this.

Spandex, legwarmers, shower scenes, ‘roid rage and bodies stuffed in lockers. Killer Workout is what you hoped for, and more.

Plus, lots of fun extras, shorts and your puppet MCs, Cheesecake and Thunderclap.

SO BAD… IT’S GOOD!

This entry was posted on Wednesday, June 16th, 2010 at 11:00 pm and is filed under Blog, Public Screening. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.